(no subject)

[amruniel]

Had quite a hard week.
First of all my family had a big row... my parents are talking about getting divorced once again... saw my teenage-brother cry and it literally broke my heart. He's always the tough, grown-up guy or at least he pretends to be and it's been the first time in years I saw his tears and heard his sobs.
At the moment at home is kind of a forced truce... it's not bad... but it is neither great.
Kind of tough... and to everybode outside these doors I have to be the eversmiling woman. I'm really sick of pretending everything is okay ...

Since Monday I've been to our annual  Dancing- Summer-Workshop and I'm really sad that today's the last. We learned a choreography to "1,2 Step" by Chiara and it's been quite fun. Easy steps for myself who's dancing these kind of choreographys 4 years now, quite hard for those who tried it the first time.
But I had a great time, being at my dancing school, meeting B, I, S and L again (haven't seen them for a while, some of them I haven't seen since our last performance in June). Yeah it's really sad that it's over today... no dancing for the next 1 and a half months until our regular training sessions start again.

BUT since yesterday I'm the pround owner of a DVD containing all our on stage performances of the last 4 years. And I have to admit - I really really enjoyed watching all those little catastrophes and magic moments. We has some really bad gigs (especially our first one... *buries herself ashamed*) and some outstanding ones... and the best of all has been our last stage-show in June... it's perfect. (At least kind of... if you know where to look for them you can find some minor mistakes... but... that's life).
I'm really looking forward to dancing on stage again soon. It's the best. It's my life. I'd do everything to be able to do it.

Am going to lie down again now... watching some TV, hoping my bellyache disappears soon. I do SO hate it... each month at least one or two days cramps ... it's such a pain in the ass... *feels like a poor, poor girl* *suffers*